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    題干:ItwasalovelydayattheparkandStellaBianchiwasenjoyingthesunshinewithhertwochildrenwhenayoungboy,agedaboutfour,approachedhertwo-year-oldsonandpushedhimtotheground.“I’dwatchedhimforalittlewhileandmysonwasthefourthorfifthchildhe’dshoved,”shesays.”Iwentovertothem,pickedupmyson,turnedtotheboyandsaid,firmly,’No,wedon’tpush,”Whathappenednextwasunexpected.“Theboy’smotherrantowardmefromacrossthepark,”Stellasays,”Ithoughtshewascomingovertoapologize,butinsteadshestartedshoutingatmefordiscipliningherchild.AllIdidwaslethimknowhisbehaviorwasunacceptable.WasIsupposedtositbackwhileherkiddidwhateverhewanted,hurtingotherchildrenintheprocess?”Gettingyourownchildrentoplayniceisdifficultenough.Dealingwithotherpeople’schildrenhasbecomeaminefield.Inmyhouse,jumpingonthesofaisnotallowed.Inmysister’shouseit’sencouraged.Forher,it’saboutkidsbeingkids:“Ifyoucan’tdoitatthree,whencanyoudoit?”Eachofthesephilosophiesisvalidand,ithastobesaid,mysonlovesvisitinghisaunt’shouse.ButIfindmyselfsaying“no”alotwhenherkidsareoveratmine.That’sOKbetweensistersbutbecomesdangerousterritorywhenyou’retalkingtothechildrenoffriendsoracquaintances.“Kidsaren’tallraisedthesame,”agreesProfessorNaomiWhiteofMonashUniversity.“Butthereisstillanideathatthey’rethepropertyoftheparent.Weseeourchildrenasanextensionofourselves,soifyou’resayingthatmychildisbehavinginappropriately,thenthat’ssomehowacriticismofme.”Inthosecircumstances,it’sdifficulttoknowwhethertoapproachthechilddirectlyortheparentfirst.Therearetwoschoolsofthought.“I’dgotothechildfirst,”saysAndrewFuller,authorofTrickyKids.“Usuallyaquietreminderthat‘wedon’tdothathere’isenough.Kidshavefinelytunedantennae(直覺)forhowtobehaveindifferentsettings.”Hepointsoutbringingitupwiththeparentfirstmaymakethemfeelneglectful,whichcouldcauseproblems.Ofcourse,approachingthechildfirstcanbringitsownheadaches,too.ThisiswhyWhiterecommendsthatyouapproachtheparentsfirst.Raiseyourconcernswiththeparentsifthey’rethereandaskthemtodealwithit,”shesays.Askedhowtoapproachaparentinthissituation,psychologistMeredithFulleranswers:“Explainyourneedsaswellasstressingtheimportanceofthefriendship.Prefaceyourremarkswithsomethinglike:’Iknowyou’llthinkI’msillybutinmyhouseIdon’twant…’”Whenitcomestosituationswhereyou’recaringforanotherchild,whiteisstraightforward:“commonsensemustprevail.Ifthingsdon’tgowell,thenhaveachat.”There’reacoupleofnewgreyareas.Physicalpunishment,onceacceptedfromanyadult,isnolongerappropriate.“Anewsetofconsiderationshascometotheforceaspartofthedebateabouthowwehandlechildren.”ForAndrewFuller,thechild-centricnatureofoursocietyhasaffectedeveryone:”Therulesaredifferentnowfromwhentoday’sparentsweregrowingup,”hesays,“Thedayswhenakidcamehomefromschoolandsaid,“Igotintotrouble”.Anddadsaid,‘youprobablydeservedit.’areover.Nowtheparentsarecharginguptotheschooltohaveagoatteachers.”Thisjumpingtoourchildren’sdefenseispartofwhatfuelsthe“walkingoneggshells”feelingthatsurroundsourdealingswithotherpeople’schildren.Youknowthatifyouremonstrate(勸誡)withthechild,you’regoingtohavetodealwiththeparent.It’sadmirabletobeprotectiveofourkids,butisitgood?“Childrenhavetolearntonegotiatetheworldontheirown,withinreasonableboundaries,”AndrewFullersays.“Isuspectthatit’sonlycertainsectorsofthepopulationdoingtherunningtotheschool–better–educatedparentsareprobablymorelikelytobetooinvolved.”AndrewFullerdoesn’tbelievethatweshouldbeafraidofdealingwithotherpeople’skids.“Lookatkidsthataren’tyourownasapotentialminefield,”hesays.Herecommendsthatwedon’tstaysilentoverinappropriatebehavior,particularlywithregularvisitors.
    題目: Professor Naomi White of Monash University agrees that
  • A 、complaint about a child's inappropriate behavior is seen as somehow a criticism of the parents
  • B 、start shouting at her boy for shoving other kids to the ground and disciplining the boy
  • C 、the“walking on eggshells” feeling that surrounds our dealings with other people’s children
  • D 、explain your needs while at the same time stressing the importance of the friendship
  • E 、come over to make an apology for what her son has done
  • 、we treat our children as objects whose appearance and achievements are something we can be proud of, rather than serve the best interests of the children
  • 、a quiet reminder to the bad-behaved kid is enough and usually kids have the intuition for how to behave in different settings

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原文線索“But there is still an idea that they’re the property of the parent. We see our children as an extension of ourselves, so if you’re saying that my child is behaving inappropriately, then that’s somehow a criticism of me.”

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